The Kissing Conundrum

It is not sure if the movie, Pretty Woman  is to take credit for immortalizing whores for being famous for not kissing but that has become what separates us from non-paid sex.  As a whore, it finds this laughable but only because to me sex is a business and the ability it has to compartmentalise each experience means that everyone will leave their time with it feeling special and unique.

Personally, it LOVES to be kissed.  A deep french kiss drives it wild and gets it immediately cunt immediately slick. It is ironic though because it rarely gets this opportunity.  In its private life it is single and currently under consideration to be a slave.  The Master it is currently answering to, understands how much it values the kiss and therefore sees it as a great reward. 

When you speak about the GFE experience, the difference usually is kissing but often times many freeze up and don’t know how to handle that level of intimacy with a woman they are compensating for time spent with them.  All at once it is interpreting his body language and trying to get him to feel comfortable and maybe a little vulnerable because that is what creates a truly unique and special time.  The feeling of being in sync, cheek to cheek, tongue in tongue, lips on lips immediately creates that bond because you are so close to that person.

It is ironic that men are more comfortable having their cocks sucked or fucking a woman than actually putting their mouth on hers….and so it goes that there has to be something “special” but at the end of the day it believes sex is sex and love is no matter what you are doing.  

The heart is a different organ entirely, emoting something unique and special that can not be reproduced. So don’t be shy to kiss us next time..

your kinky courtesan xx


Party Time

Last night was another fantastic night of DDevious playgroup time.  It is sometimes called by the organizers to co-host as a single to entertain the single men who delight in the fact that it is quite the exhibitionist and has oral skills leave them  “unable to cum for the rest of the night” (one man’s words).  
It hasn’t been to parties in a while but as of late it has picked up its co-hosting duties as a way to keep active with its bisexual needs.  Of course, many times it is hit or miss BUT sometimes the mood is just right and the scenes can get pretty hot with some v. intense group play.   It always makes sure to get in the thick of play and find a sweet set of lips to suck on – and by that it means on the face and the cunt!

The slut loves an orgy, the heat of entangled bodies,  sucking on a woman’s large, plump breasts as she is face fucked and it takes a guy doggy style while, she gets fucked.  Its like Twister -the sex version!  Yes, this is ideally how the slut likes to end up at these parties and luckily how it has been at the last couple.

Until the next ddevious delight…

your kinky courtesan xx

End of a Chapter

It is happy. Genuinely.  For the first time probably ever.  People in its life have noticed a change in attitude for the better.  All it has wanted was to be His – collared.  Owned. To serve in all ways.   It is not a doormat though.   Slaves are not born, they are made.  It takes a strong, secure individual to be a slave and it takes someone extra special to be its Master.  They are always developing, growing and learning and good Master expects mistakes and is ready to punish with a firm hand followed up with a empathetic embrace.

Life is funny.  People come into your life for different reasons. He is extremely special. Being a slave is a special role. The emotional, mental and physical toll it puts on it can be overwhelming and a good Master takes his role v. seriously, understanding that even at a basic level slaves have needs too in order to serve their Master to the best of their ability.

His needs are its needs.  His wants are its wants. His desires are its desires. Plain and simple.  It fears failing, it fears disappointing Him but then it takes a deep breath and looks at its life from the long term and knows that having his commitment would quiet it and make it invincible. That is what a good Master does – empowers.

This culmination of almost 2.5 years has been quite an experience. Ironically, it wasn’t because of the time spent together and the experience but more because of what it has learned about itself.  

And so it senses the end of this chapter, the final chapter. It is ready and strong enough to either move on to the next stage – the path to collaring, or letting go and moving on.

The next chapter will be v. excited either way – a life as a collared slave or an independent whore living its dream.

It will never apologize for loving Him either way because whether He is in its life not, it always will.

your kinky courtesan xx

Support Systems

This can be a lonely business, especially when you are independent.  As a neophyte, it has decided to take the proactive approach and reach out to other women in the trade to ask advice and just talk shop.  The reaction, it has received so far has been warm and welcoming and it is meeting with a fellow escort next week.

Escorting is a business just like any other.  The product you offer is somewhat commoditized so it comes down to the experience and the individual selling experience. In that way the biggest competition you face is really yourself.  No matter what you have to always keep pushing forward and staying positive, even through the run around, cancelations, and silences.   Focus on perfecting the business and service end of it. Listen to feedback.

The support systems will help with the burnout and help spur creativity and innovation and its to have friends to relate to. Let’s also not forget that escorts are real women too with feelings, thoughts and interests…It is looking forward to building a community….

your kinky courtesan xx

Slave Thoughts Remixed

It is important to recognize when your life is at a crossroads and to take appropriate action. When it lost its vanilla job, it opened up opportunity.  The opportunity to live a life it has dreamed of for 2 years, meshing its kink and vanilla life completely.

This is has been a process.  A journey it is still continuing on.  Here are a few things it has learned so far….

 – Slaves aren’t doormats.  From a vanilla perspective, many people would assume that because of the nature of the shift in power, the slave is a doormat to be walked on.  A slave must have a strong sense of self as  it takes someone quite special to selflessly give and always think of his needs before your own.

Live the life for YOU not HIM.  This is a critical point because many slaves get involved when they are still finding themselves and are seduced by the narcissistic need to be needed.  Take a step back and examine WHAT attracts you to the relationship and if the answer is because its the only way to be with him……RUN.  In the meantime, indulge in the lifestyle for YOU.

As slaves we are not lovers, best friends or counselors.  We are how you mold us.  We are special creatures ready to be what you need.

A Good Master Doesn’t Waste  a Good Slaves time.  It could be easy for a Master to string a slave along with the potential opportunity to be collared. However, an unselfish and understanding Master would be honest in with his limitations.

Always Assume You are Not the Only One.  This statements speaks for itself.  If you are his slave you are special in your own right and you be called upon to prepare other women.

-Enjoy.  Being a slave is not easy but it can be v. rewarding. If you aren’t having fun, what’s the point?

your kinky courtesan xx

10 Things You Didn’t Know..

Thought it would be nice to share a few things about itself that you not now…light and fun stuff in no particular order..Feel free to share as well….

1.  Its a cancer – loyal, passionate, sensitive, and domestic…believe it or not…
2.  It is a slut and whore but it still believes in soul mates. 
3.  When it was 21 it had an abortion with its now ex-husband.  When we married, the desire for kids never rose.  Eleven years, later there is still no desire to be a mother.  There are other ways to show unconditional love – being an Aunt is its most important role. 
4.  Sunday morning mass is its quite, reflective time.
5. It loves a bold Bordeaux, a fruity Pinot, and a buttery Chardonnay but nothing beats the bubbly of Champagne.
6.  Its favorite holiday is Thanksgiving. No presents, just family presence. 
7.  Losing ones grandparents is extremely difficult.  When there are none left, you come to appreciate lineage and family history.   Appreciate them and their humility in the present not posthumously. 
8.  For as much as it loves to be fucked and to suck cock, nothing is more meaningful to it than a really good kiss. 
9.  It sleeps naked except for socks.   
10.  It has one wish.  That’s it.  
your kinky courtesan xx 


Self-awareness.  A 2 year journey and climbing.  Never in this life did it ever envision it could have what it truly wants, that it could reconcile its wants and desire of vanilla and kink in unity one another, brick by brick… That is why it is so fascinated by architecture,  the beautiful buildings that envelope old towns and modern cities, made up of somewhat ordinary materials but when combined with structure, discipline and originality – a one of a kind.

For so long it was burdened by fear and insecurity.  The stuff that nobody really talks about.   A journey of self-discovery and honesty because when one choose the lifestyle of a slave,  the only thing you have is the strength of your inner being to guide you..

Last week it suffered like no other.  A naked, raw pain of exposure of spirit and isolation.  It wasn’t sure if  it could come out of the weeds..Then without thinking, the sun rose, and life just got better.  Something clicked without overthinking.

Will it end up collared?  Who knows…It only knows that this lifestyle is about being comfortable with who you are..and acceptance of yourself for what you are and the ability to stay true and have a sense of humor.

Thank you for letting it share…..

your kinky courtesan xx

Creators of Opportunity

Yesterday was its firs time legitimately.  It was v. nervous at first, it wasn’t like answering or responding ads on CL for an NSA good time, these guys were serious.  They are men of all different ages (mostly older) who are willing to pay handsomely for a  little companionship.

First impressions – the hotel was not upscale.  A budget option in downtown Manhattan, that was made for afternoon delights.   As it got in the elevator, the blood rushed to its ears, “ok put your game face on”….The door opened and when it saw the envelope on the table, its heart rate slowed…

Its life is measured in time more than ever before.  Time is money, measured in 30 minutes increments. The ability to make someone feel wanted an special is a true talent…courtesans do not sell their bodies, we are creators of opportunity. It  is within a discreet amount of time that you can be and say whatever and whoever you want to be, without judgement.

A safe haven for you to animate your deepest desires.

your kinky courtesan xx

Switch Revelation

Today it had a session with slave and realized its dominant side.  Well, it new it always existed because it often topped him in situations and thoroughly enjoyed it but the point is that it has finally realized that being a switch will be good for development of its slave self.  

How does that make sense? Well, it is a slave to one Master.  Submissive to those he requires it to bottom.  It will answer only to him.  Absolute and true. The dominant side in it help it to be fearless, open to its vulnerabilities and to face its insecurities and turn them into strengths rather than run away from them.  

your kinky courtesan xx

Reflecting on the Past, To Understand the Future

Over the weekend it reactivated it’s Blackberry to have an additional phone for work.  In doing that it was able to read the old bbm messages that existed between it and its former Master.   A relationship, 2 years in the making officially ended in December due to the careless  words and actions of this slut.  It was eye opening to say the least, and just what it needed as the messages revealed quite a bit…

It will take accountability for a few things that created the mess unpleasant situation situation that has existed, particularly over the the last few months..

1. it lost is “amazingness” –  He said “if you are amazing I will never stray, if you are not, I will use you when I can” .  No longer is it at the amazing point and it hasn’t been there for awhile.   Its confidence became overshadowed by insecurity. Insecure that you are smart enough, successful enough or just plain good enough – some other woman will be better.  Eventually, if you keep saying it, it comes true.  You are no longer a priority.  Like a virus it began to spread into almost every aspect of the relationship. There were no boundaries. anymore. Time to reclaim..

2. lost in translation? – admittedly, it loves to talk.  While it has always prided itself on being a good listener,  it has developed a habit of hearing and interpreting things in its own way.  Not taking what is said at face value.  Is this an issue of trust? Stubbornness?  Simplicity is key.

3.  Its in the Actions, not words… In a p/e relationship you are only as good as what you “do” not what you “say”.  Consistency in action is what builds a lasting, strong, harmonious relationship.

4. Like Frankie says “relax” has finally learned to shut up and be honest.  If it can be honest, open and vulnerable..what is the point?

Slaves are special creatures and when they blossom the bond that develops with its Master is unbreakable.   It is a powerful thing to own a life.

your kinky courtesan xx

M/s – Understanding True P/E

As it evolves in this lifestyle, the understanding and behavior of what it truly means to be a slave to a Master become more apparent – its not based in lust, or love, rather its based trust, loyalty and the need to forfeit control to another.

A slave is an an object, not a person. It is guided, disciplined and protected by its Master but it may never necessarily be loved.  If enters into an M/s relationship with vanilla relationship expectations it is surely a recipe for disaster.

Personally, it took this slave a long time to fully understand and be completely vulnerable.  It needed to understand that it would never be its Master’s lover or best friend.  Master don’t make love to slaves.   They fuck their slaves – how they see fit or not.  They may make love to others in front of you though.  A good Master is always transparent because his slave will never ask questions.

You may be asking yourself – why be a slave?  Sounds like you are getting the short end…Not at all.   On the contrary, slaves have the strongest minds and wills.  It is a gift to give a Master total power and control over your being and if they are good, they don’t take their responsibilities lightly.

The journey is never complete and a healthy M/s relationship is never stagnant always pushing and growing both sexually and emotionally.  Yes, it takes highly evolved, emotional mature individuals to successful maneuver the ins & outs of p/e.

When challenges arise, as they often will, it is important to remember never to do or say anything that could be irreparable.   Words often have a much longer lasting sting than sadistic implement.

Take it from someone who had a v. bumpy ride and is finally on the smooth path to promise…

your kinky courtesan xx

A Wise Man Once Said…

“A man can cherish, love and protect the property the man owns. But first he must want to own it, and to do what he takes to own it he must covet and desire it.”

Really understanding the meaning of what this meant took awhile to process.  Not often do opportunities come along in life where you have any the opportunity to get what you want.  The important thing is to recognize that you may never have the opportunity again, to realize how precious it is and take action to make it happen.

your whore, xx