I masturbated today. As a general rule, I never masturbate alone. Perhaps, it was the adrenaline rush after Taekwando or maybe it was the wet and damp weather in NYC. I just felt like playing with myself. When I say “playing” I mean really doing a number, with one caveat, I won’t finish. A good submissive never finishes without permission and its a cardinal sin to do it alone. I like to challenge myself.
Tears were streaming down my face. I think we all need to self-fuck sometimes. This isn’t about anyone or anything but OUR OWN SELFISH PLEASURE, just for a moment, of course. We take a break from the intensity of our lives, and our work and really savor that moment where our hands, the right lube and any battery-operated or magic wands can be one with our genitalia. It just doesn’t do it justice to call it masturbation. That is why I call it a self-fuck.
What was I thinking? Well if you must know..I was thinking about you. Impure thought, with a dash of goodness and purity, of course. The dirty and v. bad things I wanted to do your body and mind when I see you. I want to fuck your mental and physical being sideways. I won’t have to ask permission this time either. You will be mine. Its time.
I harnessed all of that sexual energy and put into something bigger than me by not cumming. I’m not suggesting you do the same. Its just that as a submissive I wasn’t really in the position to release.
Bad girl. Good girl. A two-sided Mirror. The reflection that stares back is never the same.
Music mood: Hozier- ” Cherry Wine” – “Her fight and fury is fiery…And it’s worth it, it’s divine”
your kinky courtesan xx