I sometimes get emails from subs and slaves who are new to the lifestyle or maybe just trying to navigate the emotional landmines that are often expected as a result of our open vulnerability.
If I can impart any wisdom, it is to never give up. This lifestyle is not easy and is not for the faint of heart. There were many times I felt defeated and chastised myself for behaving imperfectly. It only further strained the relationship I had not only with my Master but with other people in my life as well. It is natural to get caught up on achieving the milestones and easy to forget that the happiness and strength that we derive from serving comes from within ourselves.
Many talk about surrendering. The prose are always beautiful but what does it really mean? I think it is personal. Once you bask in the uncertainty and the nakedness of your vulnerability, things begin to shift. Of course there will always be challenges and struggles but when we surrender to ourselves, we are confident in the belief that we will be taken care of.
On a personal note, my Master and I are not together but he is still ever-present in my life. We recently spent some one-on-one time together and I realize how blessed I am that we have not given up on one another, despite all the challenges we have faced. The difference between then and now is that I’m not in a hurry anymore to get to the finish line. I want to relish this journey, the pleasure of servitude and all that it entails. Ownership will come.
I welcome any questions or comments as always.
Your kinky courtesan xx