Perhaps we have E.L. James to thank for helping push the BDSM community out of the darkness and into the light.   Now the NY Times.  Ironic, isn’t it?  As fetish makes a comeback from the glory days of Hellfire and Vault, we ask ourselves if  perhaps we  enjoy remaining a bit in the dark?    The NY Times recently featured the well known club Paddles in a piece about the fascinating world of fetish..http://nyti.ms/YINowN.

It is nice to see the recognition and financial reward given to writers, designers, and advocates of the BDSM community as they do so much to keep us entertained, outfitted and in the right head space.

To be frank, I pretty much gave up on the “scene” in NYC .  I have been to events at Paddles and Iniquitas but as a single slave I  prefer to play privately and within my own groups.  I know what I am after all and as an introverted extrovert I find that big events can often be difficult to navigate solo.  As open as the community is, often you will not find many single people at these events or you will more single males but v. few single females.

There will always be bad eggs.  I always tell new people to always trust their instincts.  I get lots of messages from supposed “Doms” who say v. inappropriate things just because they think they can. Newsflash:   you don’t get up my dress by acting like a thug.

We still have a long way to go before BDSM is full accepted as a lifestyle choice but I don’t mind being in a shade of grey.

Yours truly,

your kinky courtesan xx